10. Kevin Johnson and Robert Forrey fall in love and move to Portsmouth New Hampshire where they can be be legally wed and still work to ruin a city named Portsmouth.
9. Teresa Mollette begins anger management therapy after Drs. warn that attending one more city council meeting could cause her head to explode.
8. Austin Leedom learns to write, stops lying and pays his taxes.
7. City of Portsmouth finally gains the money needed to fix the Grandview Ave. sewer problems when Rich Knoll pays 20 yrs of back water and sewer bills.
6. Jane Murray faces fact that being Mayor of Portsmouth doesn't make her a world leader and returns to Lexington, KY.
5. Harold Daub shaves ridicules moustache and gives up favorite passtime of being a public pain in the ass.
4. P-Town Underground wins best public service blog award.
3. SOGP and City Government cleared of all graft and corruption charges when it is revealed that Irish Mob really runs the city.
2. No property owned by Lee Scott burns down.
1. Everyone stops bitching and starts working together to make our town grow again.
.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Friday, December 25, 2009
BEHOLD! I BRING YOU TIDINGS OF GREAT JOY!
FIRST THE REALLY GOOD NEWS: CHRIST IS BORN! ALLELUIA!
MERRY CHRISTMAS PORTSMOUTH!
APPARENTLY THE IRISH MOB'S HARD HITTING INVESTIGATIVE
REPORT ON THE BABY JESUS ABDUCTIONS, HAS HIT A LITTLE TOO CLOSE TO HOME. BELOW IS A QUOTE FROM THAT CRAPPY EXCUSE FOR A BLOG THAT FORREY OPERATES :
" I will be taking a sabbatical from River Vices for the first half of 2010 to prepare a publication for the 300th anniversary of a church in my hometown, in Massachusetts, which I mentioned in a previous posting. I know that the results of the recent municipal elections in Portsmouth, while encouraging, do not signal the end of the problems plaguing our community, including d rugs and prostitution, but rather just the first tentative steps toward addressing them. I wish I could continue to investigate and comment on those problems in the months ahead. But I know from the past four and a half years of writing River Vices that it takes up more time than most people might imagine. It is not the writing—it is the research and the editing (the editing above all) that demands so much time. I envy those who can knock off a piece of writing with no sweat in no time. I agonize over each word and sentence and I revise constantly, and still end up dissatisfied with the results." HERE'S A NEWS FLASH, DOC A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE DISSATISFIED WITH YOUR RESULTS. FORREY GOES ON TO ACCUSE ANONYMOUS BLOGS LIKE OURS OF EITHER BEING RUN BY DERANGED PERSONS OR SKUNKS OR POSSIBLY IT COULD BE REGULAR PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT THE CAVE PEOPLE POKING AROUND IN THEIR PRIVATE LIVES OR IN OUR CASE IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE WE'RE MOBSTERS AND IN MOB CIRCLES IT PAYS TO KEEP A LOW PROFILE. THE BIG QUESTION IS WHAT IS A GAY, ATHIEST A**HOLE LIKE FORREY, DOING WORKING ON ANYTHING FOR A CHURCH, HE PROBABLY PLANS ON STEALING THEIR BABY JESUS. BUT ANYWAY AT LEAST ONE ANNOYING JERK SHOULD BE OUT OF THE BLOGOSPHERE, WE CAN ONLY HOPE THAT IT WILL PROVE TO BE PERMANENT, MAYBE GOD WILL GET HIM FOR HIS HEINOUS CRIME SPREE THIS CHRISTMAS OR MAYBE HE'LL RUN AFOUL OF SOME MOBSTERS WHO ARE NOT AS KIND AND GENTLE AS US. HEY IT COULD HAPPEN.
MERRY CHRISTMAS PORTSMOUTH!
APPARENTLY THE IRISH MOB'S HARD HITTING INVESTIGATIVE
REPORT ON THE BABY JESUS ABDUCTIONS, HAS HIT A LITTLE TOO CLOSE TO HOME. BELOW IS A QUOTE FROM THAT CRAPPY EXCUSE FOR A BLOG THAT FORREY OPERATES :
" I will be taking a sabbatical from River Vices for the first half of 2010 to prepare a publication for the 300th anniversary of a church in my hometown, in Massachusetts, which I mentioned in a previous posting. I know that the results of the recent municipal elections in Portsmouth, while encouraging, do not signal the end of the problems plaguing our community, including d rugs and prostitution, but rather just the first tentative steps toward addressing them. I wish I could continue to investigate and comment on those problems in the months ahead. But I know from the past four and a half years of writing River Vices that it takes up more time than most people might imagine. It is not the writing—it is the research and the editing (the editing above all) that demands so much time. I envy those who can knock off a piece of writing with no sweat in no time. I agonize over each word and sentence and I revise constantly, and still end up dissatisfied with the results." HERE'S A NEWS FLASH, DOC A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE DISSATISFIED WITH YOUR RESULTS. FORREY GOES ON TO ACCUSE ANONYMOUS BLOGS LIKE OURS OF EITHER BEING RUN BY DERANGED PERSONS OR SKUNKS OR POSSIBLY IT COULD BE REGULAR PEOPLE WHO DON'T WANT THE CAVE PEOPLE POKING AROUND IN THEIR PRIVATE LIVES OR IN OUR CASE IT MIGHT BE BECAUSE WE'RE MOBSTERS AND IN MOB CIRCLES IT PAYS TO KEEP A LOW PROFILE. THE BIG QUESTION IS WHAT IS A GAY, ATHIEST A**HOLE LIKE FORREY, DOING WORKING ON ANYTHING FOR A CHURCH, HE PROBABLY PLANS ON STEALING THEIR BABY JESUS. BUT ANYWAY AT LEAST ONE ANNOYING JERK SHOULD BE OUT OF THE BLOGOSPHERE, WE CAN ONLY HOPE THAT IT WILL PROVE TO BE PERMANENT, MAYBE GOD WILL GET HIM FOR HIS HEINOUS CRIME SPREE THIS CHRISTMAS OR MAYBE HE'LL RUN AFOUL OF SOME MOBSTERS WHO ARE NOT AS KIND AND GENTLE AS US. HEY IT COULD HAPPEN.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
BABY JESUS MISSING ! FORMER SSU PROF CONSIDERED "A PERSON OF INTEREST IN BIZARRE ABDUCTION
The Irish Mob has learned from sources within the Special Christmas Crimes Task Force of the PPD. Hey, we're the Irish Mob, of course we have contacts within the PPD; but to be fair, only within the Special
Christmas Crimes Task Force, the rest of the PPD are disgustingly honest. At any rate our sources tell us that there have been a number of instances of the Baby Jesus disappearing from people's home creches this
Christmas season. The Special Christmas Crimes Task Force officially claims to be baffled by this series of bizarre abductions, privately our sources tell us they're pretty sure that Dr. Robert Forrey, the man the P-Town Underground has dubbed Grinch no.1, is behind the thefts.When asked why the SCCTF didn't haul his ancient dried-up, godless, ass in for questioning our source pointed out that too many of the SCCTF were CAVE people sympathizers to ever take on the groups very own little gay messiah. So there you have it Portsmouth, homes all over our great city are bereft this Christmas season , as Protestant and Catholic families alike try to adjust to a Christmas with no Baby Jesus in their Nativity Scene mangers. And this tragedy is probably due to the cruel machinations of a man who not only hates the Baby Jesus and His Father, but women and religion and the University and city that took him in after he no doubt screwed up his life wherever he was before he came here. . The Irish Mob knows that Jesus is The Reason for the Season and that if Forrey is behind this heinous crime its because he not only wants to destroy Portsmouth but Christmas as well . Be advised Herr Doktor! The citizens of this city will not tolerate this your evil hold over this city is about to end. If you ,dear reader, are fortunate enought to still have your Baby Jesus at home safe in His little manger guard Him well. Merry Christmas Portsmouth and Screw You Dr. Forrey
Sunday, December 20, 2009
BASHAM SAVES BONEYFIDDLE!
Even though he hasn't taken office yet, Third Ward Councilman-Elect Nicholas Basham is already at work helping local business owners and keeping citizens safe. On Sat. Dec.19, Councilman-Elect Basham was supporting our city's economy by doing his Christmas shopping locally. He was waiting for his purchases to be wrapped at B Sweete Chocolaterie, when he smelled something burning he turned to discover a candle had fallen over on a display table and had set some cellophane wrap on fire. The quick thinking Basham,rushed to put the fire out, not only saving the B Sweete Chocolaterie from possible destruction but perhaps saving an entire block of our historical district, since as everyone knows those old buildings sometimes burn like tinder. So while the CAVE people continue to tear our city down and revile our leaders its good to know that there are folks like Nicholas Basham out there to put out the fires.
Monday, December 7, 2009
More of Leedom's Malicious Lies and Threats
Here's the last few stirring lines of deathless prose posted by supposedly self-confessed tax evader Leedom on that pitiful excuse for a news blog of his whats it called the Shawnee Shitpile or something like that, any way notice how this jerk is already trying to intimidate co
Councilman elect Basham:
Now the question is, how is Nicholas Basham going to vote? Will he blindly vote for whatever other councilmen tell him to vote for?
Will Nicholas Basham vote as ordered by the Gang or will be vote for the citizens of the city?
The low road or the high road; Nicholas Basham must make his choice.
But, first, perhaps, Mr. Basham should consider that the gang cannot remove him from the office in humiliating disgrace, but the citizens can, and shall, remove any person who tries to violate their God-given rights as guaranteed by the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States. This is America!
Written by Austin Leedom
Monday, December 7th, 2009
Here's what the Irish Mob wants to know: Why is it all right for these numb skulls to bore the hell out of everyone with their half truths,and slanderous garbage. It's bad enough that they are free to pollute the internet with this crap. We can see it as a first amendment right for these fools to be allowed to vent their spleen in regards to items on the agenda for council meetings but its not a violation of the first amendment to refuse to allow them to get up and share their ignorance and their paranoid fantasies with folks who don't want to hear them. I mean the Irish Mob attends council meetings from time to time and since unlike Leedom we pay our city income taxes, we don't think our tax dollars should be wasted on the extra electricity and gas that must be expended just to allow these a**holes to ramble on about their delusions and feel important. We urge council to save tax money spent on utilities and do away with the right of citizens to speak on items not on the agenda. In a representative democracy we're supposed to take our concerns to our elected representative. I mean even the CAVE people great watchdogs of freedom that they are ought to understand such a basic principle. On another note we all know how Forrey, the Molettes, Ferguson, Leedom, Lee Scott, Wayne Nichols, Harold Daubs and the rest of the CAVE crew are always carping about folks who actually try to do something to help the city progress, but does anyone know what the hell these jerks have ever done that was actually of any real positive value? Maybe since they love threatening elected officials with recall petitions we could put together a petition to have the city buy their properties at a fair price and throw them them the hell out of town. Hey in the old days someone might have suggested that they sleep with the fishes, see how the Irish Mob has mellowed.
Councilman elect Basham:
Now the question is, how is Nicholas Basham going to vote? Will he blindly vote for whatever other councilmen tell him to vote for?
Will Nicholas Basham vote as ordered by the Gang or will be vote for the citizens of the city?
The low road or the high road; Nicholas Basham must make his choice.
But, first, perhaps, Mr. Basham should consider that the gang cannot remove him from the office in humiliating disgrace, but the citizens can, and shall, remove any person who tries to violate their God-given rights as guaranteed by the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United States. This is America!
Written by Austin Leedom
Monday, December 7th, 2009
Here's what the Irish Mob wants to know: Why is it all right for these numb skulls to bore the hell out of everyone with their half truths,and slanderous garbage. It's bad enough that they are free to pollute the internet with this crap. We can see it as a first amendment right for these fools to be allowed to vent their spleen in regards to items on the agenda for council meetings but its not a violation of the first amendment to refuse to allow them to get up and share their ignorance and their paranoid fantasies with folks who don't want to hear them. I mean the Irish Mob attends council meetings from time to time and since unlike Leedom we pay our city income taxes, we don't think our tax dollars should be wasted on the extra electricity and gas that must be expended just to allow these a**holes to ramble on about their delusions and feel important. We urge council to save tax money spent on utilities and do away with the right of citizens to speak on items not on the agenda. In a representative democracy we're supposed to take our concerns to our elected representative. I mean even the CAVE people great watchdogs of freedom that they are ought to understand such a basic principle. On another note we all know how Forrey, the Molettes, Ferguson, Leedom, Lee Scott, Wayne Nichols, Harold Daubs and the rest of the CAVE crew are always carping about folks who actually try to do something to help the city progress, but does anyone know what the hell these jerks have ever done that was actually of any real positive value? Maybe since they love threatening elected officials with recall petitions we could put together a petition to have the city buy their properties at a fair price and throw them them the hell out of town. Hey in the old days someone might have suggested that they sleep with the fishes, see how the Irish Mob has mellowed.
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